Sunday, March 5, 2017

this desert my heart

he looks at me like someone
who remembers the last time 
we went to bed
like really went to bed

and i can almost not take it
the way his eyes stick
dragging over my breasts
my thighs
my lips
so heavy
it leaves me slick 

dissanta beshemen g'viyati 
but do i spill over?
i am a vessel contained.

he remembers other days,
as he knows them all
when only saying my name
would spread me out like the sky

he remembers when i screamed his name
but now in this wilderness
my tongue has lost the vowels

i am reduced to consonantal silence
i tear about in the gale 
neither going nor coming

rutzeh ahuvi l'hatzileni 
ahuvi l'ezrati khushah 

my rebellion is my own
ha'midbar ha'zeh 
hu ha'lev sheli

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